Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Haircism

Before:



After:


As you can see from these lovely before and after photos, i have cut my trademark shaggy hair (actually, it happened way back in October, and then again in December, and is scheduled for next week to happen again). To me it was a simple thing - i wanted a change, so i acted on it. My character has not changed, i am not a "new man" or any of that bullshit - i used to have longer hair, and now it is short. Case closed.

Well, not exactly.

Apparently, everyone in the world, 'cept me and my smart friends/family, thinks my haircut has had an impact on the world the likes of which have not been seen aside from some very famous structures coming down (the WTC, the Berlin Wall, etc). People all the time say things like "I cannot BELIEVE that you cut your hair - that is insane!" Why is it insane? Why is it inconceivable that i could want to change how my hair looks?

However, worse yet are the people who make totally ignorant, shitty comments like "Oh Brian, i just respect you so much more with your hair short. It's like i can relate to you so much more now!" Fuck you shallow ho - where do you get off telling me that appearance has a damn thing to do with how people relate? Do you like me better than an even uglier person? Do you repsect me more because i can walk on my own two feet and i'm not in a wheelchair?

Just this past Friday someone came up to me and said "Excuse me, are you the same youth minister who started last summer?" I said "Yes." So she says, "Oh my. I didn't even recognize you. The last time i saw you i couldn't even pay attention to what you were saying because how you looked. This is much better!" And this came from someone IN CHURCH. What happened to the whole no judgement thing that guy Jesus was all about? And i'm sorry to break it to you folks, but i didn't have a 70s Afro or a 80s CeCe DeVille coif, i had shaggy hair. Its not like i pulled off some wig to reveal my bald head. I just cut my hair! I really cannot see how people can get away with such blatant discrimination based on someone's haircut. If so, that dude from A Flock of Seagulls must have never been able to do any sort of banking, food shopping or eating out, because his hair clearly looked stupider than mine did, and mine apparently made people tune me out and become incapable of relating with me.

The lesson i learned from all of this: Shave your head and see how people treat you. Then you'll be able to see who in your life is a total moron. And its cheaper than giving them all an IQ Test.

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Random Thoughts

Random Thoughts:

Andre 3000 is awesome. Tonight i listend to The Love Below for the first time in probably close to a year and its fucking impressive. Its a 'concept album' that doesn't feel forced and there is really some great playing on it. The bassline on "Prototype" for instance - it smokes. Plus, who doesn't love a cameo from Farnsworth Bentley?

Easter candy might slightly surpass Halloween candy as the best seasonal candy. I guess there are just more specific Easter candies: Cadbury Eggs (the best candy on earth), Peeps (although they have begun to infiltrate the rest of the year), plus all sorts of assortments of the usual beloved candies in egg form.

Pavement's "Carrot Rope" has not been out of my head for like 3 days. But its a great song. I think that and "Stereo" might be their two best songs. And i still maintain that Malkmus solo is better than Pavement 9 times out of 10. But those two songs blow away any solo Malkmus song. Oh, and i'm going to see him in June @ Irving Plaza. Yeah for me. Viva la Jicks

I am starting to get really antsy for spring (and not for the same reason as i liked spring in college Erin). Fuck this cold weather. I'm sick of it.

I'm determined to learn more banjo chords. I keep saying that, but lately i've REALLY wanted to learn more. So yeah - everyone get on me about learning more banjo.

If you're on myspace, add my record label as a friend. Trying to spread the word. http://www.myspace.com/thefranklinrecordingco

Let's go Mets!

My whitetrash neighbors are really taking it to new levels lately. When the weather is a little warmer than freezing, the one guy busts out his HOT leather jacket w/ the sleeves cut off with a wonderful embroidered American flag and the word AMERICA on the back. Now that is class. As are the 50+ items my mom counted on their back lawn once.

Anyone else see the daytime TV commercial featuring the dog telling you about insurance.com? It might be the stupidest commercial on principle of all time.

More later this week...

Thursday, March 03, 2005

BriFlix

Hey everyone.

Sorry for the relatively quiet week. I've been busy, dammit! Anyway, lately i've seen a lot of movies, and i've notcied that a lot of these films are quite similar to older films that perhaps many people aren't aware of. So, here goes the first edition of BriFlix!


If you liked...
Napoleon Dynamite

Then try...
Ghost World



As most of you probably know, Napoleon Dynamite follows a boy named, well, Napoleon Dynamite through those award high school times. This film depicts a person so bizarre that it is almost impossible to relate. This is not a criticism of the film, just a fact (i enjoyed the film a lot).

Ghost World also follows a socially inept person, this time named Enid, through the summer after graduating high school. This is a much more, i suppose, realistic story and the characters are all much easier to relate to. Plus, you have the sweet eye candy of a pre-skank Scarlett Johanson, the underrated Thora Birch, and my personal favorite actor, Steve Buscemi. Plus both films feature nunchucks. How awesome is that?


If you liked...
Shaun of the Dead

Then try...
Evil Dead 2


Pretty much one of the first attempts to bridge comedy and horror, Evil Dead 2 is just plain awesome. As is Shaun of the Dead. What Barry (Jack Black) says in High Fidelity can easily be applied to both films: "Its so funny and violent, and the soundtrack kicks fucking ass." If you enjoyed Shaun's mixture of humor and blood, see where it all started. And if you want a straight up low budget horror movie, rent the original, The Evil Dead.


If you liked...
Million Dollar Baby


Then try...
Raging Bull



First off, if you liked Million Dollar Baby, then you either a) bought the hype, or b) are an asshole. The only accurate review of the film can be found HERE.

But seriously, if you thought that Million Dollar Baby was a good boxing movie, watch one that really hits all the important points - the violence of the sport (which MDB never really shows you), realistic fight sequences, and actual good acting (minus Hillary Swank, who was excellent. But c'mon, Morgan Freeman is the same in every film, and Clint Eastwood is a prune with lips). Plus, DeNiro gained 60 lbs for the scenes when he is the older Jake LaMotta. Now that is method acting, biotches.

Stay tuned for more BriFlix.